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Carla Abellana to women who are in bad relationships: 'Make sure you don't lose yourself'

By John Patrick Magno Ranara Published Dec 02, 2023 3:20 pm

Carla Abellana has some words of wisdom for women who are stuck in an unhealthy relationship with their partners.

In an interview with Karen Davila on her YouTube channel, Carla recalled her failed marriage with her ex-husband Tom Rodriguez, whom she married in October 2021 after six years of being together and got divorced in less than a year. 

The actress confessed that even she was shocked by how quickly their marriage ended.

"At that time, sabi ko nga, this has got to be one of the fastest or the shortest [marriage]. I'd say like three months, that's very fast, so at least ngayon I can laugh about it," Carla said.

"Of course, it's not a joke. That's not a good thing that it was very short. Talagang I never imagined that I'd end up getting married and have such a short marriage," she added.

"Disrespect and lying" are some of the many reasons their marriage did not work out, but Carla has since forgiven Tom for what he did.

She has now learned from this experience and become more knowledgeable about spotting red flags in relationships.

When asked what advice she can give to women who are with abusive and unfaithful partners, Carla said, "I guess my only advice is to make sure you don't lose yourself and you respect yourself pa rin. You don't forget yourself."

"It always comes to a point when enough is enough, so hopefully they know kung hanggang kailan nila kaya," she added.

Carla admitted that she reached a point where she lost herself during her relationship with her ex-husband, but only realized it when it was over.

"The red flags pa lang, parang forgetting about them and not minding them. Doon pa lang parang form of disrespecting yourself because you may have boundaries, pero nagko-cross 'yung boundaries," she recalled.

She continued, "Of course, it was a choice to forgive the person and all that to stay in the relationship, pero I never listened to myself." 

Despite their long romance that only failed, Carla stressed that she doesn't think of it as if her life got stolen.

"As much as I would like to think and believe na seven years of my life were stolen from me, no naman kasi I was part of that relationship. It was my choice, it was my decision to stay that long," she said.

Rumors about their separation began circulating in January 2022, with Tom confirming that they had ended their relationship in June of the same year.